Monday, Monday

It's been a while since I wrote something just for the sake of writing. I find it very therapeutic to write and know that my life is a little chaotic when I don't make or find the time to consider what's going on around me and put it into words.

Last Thursday, the area was struck my a horrific storm which not only boasted the most torrential downpour of rain I have ever seen, it brought with it an F1 tornado. I have never been near a tornado before and this one landed just 400 yards from my house. I wasn't home at the time and am so sorry for my little doggy friends who must have been terrified. Thankfully, my family, friends, house and property are all completely fine. My parents and i drove around yesterday to see the local damage and today I am off to pick up more books about 1/2 hour away, so I will likely see more of the destruction on my way there.

Other than that, my life has been rather consumed by putting the dossier together. For those of you who are about to start it, it's really not a big deal. I freaked out a little, ok a lot, but that was only because it was a very emotional stage for me. I have found that I am reacting differently to various stages than most seem to. For example, I am fine with this waiting period that I am about to enter. I see it as time for me to nest, study Russian , and continue to raise as much of the remaining $15,000 as I can. Yes, you heard it, I have raised over $20,000 since January 1, 2008. How's THAT for some amazing people and support?

I find myself consumed by a new persistent thought pretty much all of the time these days. When I sit at my parents' beach I think, "This time next year I will be doing this with a little peanut." At the quaint and quite nice New England fair I went to this weekend in Canterbury, NH I was thinking, will my Bugaboo fit through this small aisle? HA! Yes, my friends, I am still obsessed with strollers. My latest hobby is stopping random moms on the street and interrogating them about their strollers. It's quite amusing actually.

And here is the final thing that is going through my mind almost constantly. Lily has been born now. THAT is just amazing to me. Somewhere on the other side of the world, my daughter awaits. I wonder if she knows that I am looking for her?